okay, new kids:

• I am An Old
• aro/ace she/they
• proship, anti-anti, pro fantasy, pro fictional fuckery
• in reality, be kind
• Also, I have been known to put dicks on your dash

You’ve been warned.

g-arya:

the-fair-maiden-of-fandom:

marvel-lous-things:

seananmcguire:

learnyourlessonswell:

fuckingships:

marvel-lous-things:

Bartender: thanks for stopping that bar fight, spiderman. Can I get you a drink? It’s on the house

Peter: thank you, but I can’t

Bartender: why not

Peter:

Bartender:

Peter, trying not to give his age away: I’m pregnant

Bartender, shook: oh, congratulations, boy or girl?

Peter, now in full-on panic mode: it’s an uh, spider

I’m seeing stuff in the notes about “Miles would do this” and I just want to say: you’re absolutely right. All Spider-folks across all universes share one (1) singular brain cell and most of the time it’s Gwen’s.

As the current author of Spider-Gwen, I can attest that Gwen has not seen the brain cell in years.

I FOUND IT

I finally lay my eyes upon this glorious post myself

fozmeadows:

akumeoy:

getting murdered but it’s so traumatic i repress the memory and only actually die years later during hypnotherapy

the sixth sense (1999)

fuck-customers:

Funny story from the other night:

A dad came into my cafe with his 3 year old daughter.  He bought her a cookie and himself a coffee.  They sit down, and I go back to my pre-closing cleaning.  Three minutes later the dad walks up to the counter again, so I stop cleaning and walk over to greet him again.

As I’m in the middle of saying “hi” he cuts me off and says “Water.”

Not “Can I get a glass of water, please?” not “Where can I get water?” not even a confused “water?” like he’s not sure how to get water in this cafe.  Just a single word demand.

I work in silicon valley, so I’m kind of used to techies talking to me like I’m Siri or Alexa, but it still always drives me crazy when they do this.  Like, I don’t even care about the “please” anymore, I just want people to talk to me in complete sentences.  So I get the guy a cup of water, and he sits back down. 

As I’m about to go back to cleaning I hear his daughter go “Daddy, you did that WRONG.  You have to say ’CAN I have a glass of water PLEASE’”

My jaw hit the ground.  The dad suddenly became flustered and tried coming up with excuses “I-I said please…” “No you didn’t!” “Well she was busy…. I didn’t want to bother her…..” “You still got to be polite!”

When they were done eating the dad brought the dishes back to the counter and said “Thank you so much!” It’s amazing how fast someone’s manners can improve when a 3 year old calls them out.

Shout out to whoever is teaching that little girl manners, because you know it’s not her dad.  I hope she never stops calling rude people out.

supreme-leader-stoat:

dakotaqueen:

dakotaqueen:

dakotaqueen:

Teach me how to use my tumblog

I am tumbling

Do not curse me

I bet you I can find the post in that photo.

orcboxer:

undead-tboy-swag:

if your weird enough with the homies you can break all boundaries of platonic/romantic love and make a third, more evil thing

a podcast…

amerykah:

Comics are the perfect medium they’re so perfect that God made them really tedious and unrewarding to produce so that we wouldn’t be completely overwhelmed by them

goldensunset:

in small fandoms you need to be grateful to the person who only accidentally hit you twice with a frying pan while trying to make you breakfast. in big fandoms you can block people for wearing a shirt you don’t like